This week I got a call from a friend I haven't heard from in a long time. There wasn't anything extraordinary about the actual call. What was new was how I felt after it was over. I didn't replay the call. I didn't lament what was said or not said. I didn't question that I spoke what was true for me. I didn't feel confused about where my borders were when I was done. What changed? When I hung up the phone, I also remembered to disconnect the line of energy between us.
|Artwork by Kathleen Keagy|
I don't see connection as the problem. It's the connection being in the “always on” position that is the rub. It's exhausting—like I've left my lights on and allowed my battery to be drained until it doesn't have anything left to keep me running. And these "always on" connections create clutter that makes it difficult for someone new to enter my life, even if it's someone I want to get to know.
When I hung up the phone with my friend the other day, I didn't just hang up the call. I switched off the energy current that was connecting us. Since then I've started putting energy switches in other areas of my life including my work, so that I can turn down the energy I'm sending when it's not really needed. It has taken a bit of faith for me to trust that the connection will be there without me investing in it all the time, but when I've tested it over the last few days I've been able to reconnect pretty easily. What I've noticed is that when I don't have all those low-level currents continuously running, I have more current—more energy—for me. I am more vital, healthy, creative, grounded in my body and available to receive whatever is right here in the moment. And that feels really good.