Monday, September 2, 2013

Moving Sideways


When I look back to when I began this blog, I remember how daunted I was by the prospect of sharing my thoughts and feelings in such a public way. I remember the trepidation that accompanied every time I would click “Publish” on my latest post. I remember how committed I was to writing every week when I started, and then how life came in and made alterations to my plans. Mostly, I remember how good it felt to have something external to show for all the internal work I was doing where no one else could see it. 

Photo by Kathleen Minogue Keagy
“What We Carry” I remember the day I settled on that name for my blog. It was exactly where I was at the time--just beginning to understand how much the past was defining me and committing to the process of letting it go. Sometimes I went so far inside that I lost track of the day to day. I think about all the time that I was not fully present in the moment because I was being pulled backwards into old pictures or projecting forward into a future tied to those old pictures. I am so grateful for all the healers and friends who stood by and listened to my stories with compassion, knowing that at times I must have sounded like a broken record. And to my family who didn’t press when I figuratively left the room even while I was standing right next to them. 

Something has shifted sideways in the last few months. It has gotten quiet in my internal world. The script I have been running in my head for many years is now a faint whisper.  So many false pictures of dependency and co-dependency have been cleared out of my space. I now feel free to create out in the world without fear of being side-swiped by some emotional storm from the past, and my confidence that I can handle whatever comes my way without losing my center is surging.

These have been years of immense growth. While some people go on a journey to connect with the spiritual over the course of their lives, I have never had difficulty accessing the world of spirit. My journey is learning to be more of the world. Now that I am not hampered by so many of those emotional suitcases I carried into this life, I am manifesting with greater and greater speed. I listen to family stories with compassion, not responsibility. And as difficult as it is for me not to help every injured bird that walks into my view, I am doing it differently. I am more emotionally detached in my help, knowing that love means letting people do their own healing.

I thank everyone who took the time to read my words over the last few years. I may from time to time decide to publish here, but it feels like this chapter has ended. I am no longer looking back at "What We Carry." I am looking forward. I invite you to come visit my new blog on the website for PrimeImpulse, my business focused on empowering artists and creatives to make their ideas happen. It’s still just as much me as this blog, but with a focus on grounding everything I know about the worlds of emotion and spirit into the flesh and blood of this lifetime. 

I’ll see you over there!

Check out the new blog at: www.primeimpulse.com/blog 
To keep up with the latest posts, like the PrimeImpulse page on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/PrimeImpulseNow

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